"I'm almost..." I hesitated. It was such an ugly thing to admit, and wasn't sure I wanted my husband to know the ugliness in my heart.
"What's wrong?" He asked, concern seeping through his voice.
I sucked in my breath and mumbled,"I'm just..I'm almost disappointed...Disappointed in God. It almost feels like He's forgotten about me."
We talked, we prayed, we discussed the reality of what God's Word teaches. I was reminded yet again, that God never changes, and what was true yesterday is still true today. I went to bed that night feeling better, but still sad.
Remember this post? Having faith that God is who He says he is one of my greatest battles I fight. Trusting that God is in control of all things, and absolutely sovereign is one of my greatest sources of joy, but it's tough at times to remember.
Last week, I committed to seeking the Lord with my whole heart. But the commitment didn't last too long. I'd pray, and ask God to please supply our needs, but as soon as I was done praying I'd go right back to doubting.
But guess what? A few days ago I received a phone call, and the thing I was praying about was answered! I didn't have to worry. I was ashamed I'd had such weak faith, but was so thankful to God. I was reminded yet again that God doesn't "need" me to do anything. But at the same time there's no reason to fear, because God is who he says he is!
"If we are faithless, he remains faithful- for he cannot deny himself." 2 Timothy 2:13