The Joke

I don't remember the last time I wasn't looked at like I was a crazy person. Actually I do, it was December 23, 2007, back when I only had one baby and no more on the way(until we found out I was expecting the next day!)

I'm used to people making comments about me having my hands full, or asking if I know what causes those babies.

It's a crazy life. But sometimes I think the joke is on the people making the comments. Yes my kids argue over toys and yes I feel overwhelmed at least once during the day. But they are each others best friends. There is always someone to play with. And Max(my five month old) might be the most adored baby brother who ever lived. 

Lily thinks Max needs company when he takes his naps.

Things are hectic. Oftentimes there are too many needs and not enough mommy to go around. But these days won't last forever. I hope and pray that when they look back on their childhood they will remember a house full of fun and laughter. It's not perfect, but it is very blessed.

This post is linked to Finer things Friday.

Comparing

I'm learning that no one has it all together. I'm  often guilty of comparing myself to other mothers. I'll start thinking that another mom is perfect, and then I'll start having thoughts like, "I bet she never yells at her kids like I sometimes do. I bet she would know how to handle this argument between her children. I'm sure her kids never throw tantrums over not getting to watch a video. Heck, her kids probably don't even know what a video is because she's the perfect mother and would never dream of exposing her children to such mindless entertainment."

Yes I suppose I can be a little irrational at times.

I'm thinking it's not that the mothers I look up to have "it" together, I'm thinking they probably just have more experience than I do. I mean when I had my first baby, I compared myself to every mother I knew. I had no idea what I was doing and I needed some ideas. Now I don't even think about what other mothers are doing with their baby's because for the most part I've learned what works for me and my babies. But I've never had a four year old, I've never home schooled, and I've never had several small children so now my temptation is to compare myself to women who have done these things.

But the problem with comparing is we tend to think someone else is doing things perfectly when the truth is no one is perfect. We all make mistakes and need grace. What works for one family might not work for ours.

We should learn from each other. And we should definitely be learning from older women. But we should never be so caught up in comparing ourselves to other women we miss out on learning what works for our families.

I'm linking up with A Wise Woman Builds Her Home.

Winner!

Congrats, Nancy! You are the winner of the Starbucks gift card!! Thanks to everyone who participated!

Causing Children to Sin

“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea." Mark 9:4

I used to read this verse and think it was a warning to child abusers. But as I've grown as a Christian and had some children, I'm beginning to see this verse in a whole new light.

Early in my mothering days I used to get pretty frustrated when one of my children would throw a tantrum. It didn't matter if it was past nap time, or past lunch time, in my mind they were disobeying. And then one day I was reading in Mark, and my eyes fell upon the word cause. Whoever causes. I realized that most of the time one of my kids threw a tantrum, or was being particularly defiant, it was almost always a result of poor planning on my part.

But realizing this has shown me how important it is to keep my children's schedule in mind when I plan things or have to run errands. And when it absolutely cannot be helped, I am reminded to show grace and mercy to my children, instead of having unrealistic expectations.

Be sure to enter the giveaway I'm having for a ten dollar Starbucks gift card!

A Giveaway!

 This giveaway is now closed! Congratulations, Nancy, I will be contacting you soon!

I love coffee. Like I can't function without it. How else do you think I survive with four kids under the age of four?! :) Starbucks is one of my favorite places to go, but with the holidays coming up my budget doesn't always allow for it. I'm guessing I'm not alone in that, and I would LOVE to bless one of my readers with a ten dollar Starbucks gift card.

To enter please leave a comment telling me a little about yourself and what your favorite drink is from Starbucks. If you don't follow this blog, please follow it or subscribe by email and leave me a comment letting me know you did so. I will leave the giveaway open until next Friday(black Friday), and then pick a number.

Hope you win! :)

Grow

Go

I desire so much to grow as a Christian. Most days I feel like I'm taking two steps forward one step back. I know most Christians feel this way, but I feel like I'm particularly stubborn. I want to be one of those women whose love for the Savior shines, who others want to be around, but I fear I look too much like the rest of the world.  More importantly, I want my husband and children to see my love for Jesus, and for my children I want them to see that love and desire to walk with Him. I want to encourage my husband to continue walking with the Lord.

But, like I said I fall so short. I let my emotions control me, I allow fear to drive me. I struggle with selfishness every minute of every day. Then I remember none of us have "arrived", not even the Christians who look like they have it all together. We all struggle with our sin nature. We all need grace to get through the day. And every time I die to my selfishness or my fears, I am that much closer to growing stronger in my faith.

Stop

5 months

My sweet Max turned 5 months old last week! I didn't feel like his baby days were flying by until I realized he had reached 5 months, which means next month he will be starting cereal, and therefore be almost college age before I know it. I'm not over dramatic at all, nope not me. :)

Max is so laid back and very sweet. He loves to smile and cracks up at his brothers and sisters. He actually keeps Erik and I up at night because he won't stop cooing! We haven't built up the courage to move him into Jack's room yet, but he will be in there before too long and Jack is super excited to have a roommate.

One thing that I don't want to forget is that for as laid back and happy as Mr. Max is there is one game that terrifies him. One night I was doing the "little piggies" to him, and when I said,"And this little piggie went weeeee all the way home!" Max burst into tears. So now anytime one of the other kids wants me to do their "piggies" and Max is in the room, he gets very serious. Needless to say I won't be playing that game with him for awhile!

Young Marriage

Awhile ago I was making small talk with another woman. Somehow the subject came up that I hadn't finished college. When I was asked why I said it was because after Erik and I had been married for about a year and a half we were blessed with Jack, and I wanted to be a stay at home mom more than I wanted to finish school.

The lady shook her head, and chuckled saying, "I bet you'd be disappointed if your daughters made those same decisions!"

Shocked I told her that we would just have to wait and see what God had planned for my girls. But obviously it bothered me what she said.

When I look back on getting engaged to Erik at 19, and then married at twenty I have absolutely no regrets. I can still remember people being surprised that we were getting married because we wanted to. We were crazy about each other. Many people told us we were too young, we should live together first-even Christians were telling us this!-and we should experience life before settling down too quickly. I realize these people had our best interests at heart, but it makes me sad that such a negative attitude exists towards marriage. Especially young marriages.

Were our early days of marriage difficult? At times, yes. We've certainly had our tough times. I'm sure you can imagine the stress we've been under first experiencing a job layoff(when I was pregnant with Lily), and then Erik going back to school full time with very little income coming in(Lily and Max were both born during this time.)

But who is to say things would've been any easier if we had waited to get married? I've only been married for close to six years, but I think it's safe to say every married couple goes through trials. These trials have strengthened our marriage, but more importantly they've drawn us closer to God.

More than likely, one day Lily and Anna are going to want to get married. It might not happen when they're 19, but it very well could. And honestly if they're walking with the Lord and wanting to stay pure, how on earth could I be disappointed in that decision?

Marriage is hard work. It's certainly not something to be taken lightly, but it also shouldn't be looked upon as a death sentence, especially among other Christians. I don't know what the future holds for my daughters when it comes to marriage, but I want to do my best to show them that marriage is one of the greatest blessings the Lord gives his children.

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Unexpected

Go

May of 2009 we experienced two huge unexpected events. The first was my husband getting laid off. The second was finding out I was pregnant with our third child. It would be our third baby, and my oldest was only 21 months. We were scared out of our minds, and incredibly stressed.

That summer was a time of growth and learning to trust God to provide for our needs. Then another unexpected event happened. God opened the doors for my husband to go back to school. It seemed crazy at the time. We had been hoping and praying for a way for him to go back to school, but didn't figure there was any way since we still owned our home, and no one was looking to buy it. 

But God had other plans, and now two years after one of the most significant trials I've experienced so far, I can see how God used all these situations to sanctify us. And not only that, but show us how much He loves us and will supply all our needs. 

I didn't expect to spend the last two years praying for God to provide for each bill we had come our way. I never expected to add two more children to our family during this very stressful time. But I'm so thankful God is sovereign. He never promises to gives us more than we can handle, but He does give us grace to handle each situation that comes our way. 

Stop


For more five minute Fridays check out the Gypsy Mama!

Learning to Listen

I've probably read fifty different books on child training. I could tell you how Ted Tripp would handle a discipline problem, and give you Sally Clarkson's opinions on discipline. There are so many voices, so many opinions out there on how to raise up the next generation that sometimes I feel numb to what the Holy Spirit is telling me to do in raising my children. Instead of looking to the Bible and praying for wisdom and direction in child training, I start looking at books or blogs to tell me how to raise my kids!

And isn't that ridiculous? The authors of blogs and writers of books don't know my kids, but God knows them better than anyone. He knows me better than anyone. And yet in my laziness I run to the latest book I'm reading to tell me how to raise my kids. And if I don't do things the way the author recommends I feel condemned. Like I'm a failure as a parent, and my children will never walk with the Lord(Hello, pressure! And also Romans 8:1, anyone?)

I'm not saying there's anything wrong with reading parenting books. In fact I've found many to be extremely helpful and encouraging, I'm just saying that they should never replace what you feel like the Holy Spirit is telling you to do. In the book, "Give Them Grace," by Elyse Fitzpatrick(yes another parenting book, ironic huh?) she makes the point that up until fifty years ago Christian parents simply loved their children, disciplined them, and told them about Jesus. Other than the Bible, there were no other books on parenting around.

I'm thankful to live in a day and age where older, wiser men and women are willing to share their wisdom in parenting. But I also need to be careful.  Parenting books were never meant to replace personal prayer and Bible study in how we raise our children.

Linked to A Wise Woman Builds Her Home.

Only Lily

Only Lily would whine to get out of her chair and then as soon as she's put down climb back in it.

Only Lily would refuse to drink her milk at the table, but want her cup as soon as she gets down.

Only Lily would lay her baby down in her little brother's bassinet and "shh" me when I walk in the room to lay her little brother down.

Only Lily would rip open a bag of flour, and try to use a golf club to help sweep it up.

Only Lily would climb on top of the kitchen table and into her brother's bumbo chair in the time span of 30 seconds.

Only Lily would insist on wearing Jack's bicycle helmet for the entire time we played outside this morning.

Yes Lily is a little bit of a handful at times, but she sure does keep life entertaining!

Remember

Remember..

If you and your husband aren't seeing eye to eye,

If you're having a tough time with one of your children,

If you have had a disagreement with a friend,

Remember..

You can't be anyone's Holy Spirit.

So before you try to take matters into your own hands

Remember..

To Pray.

Our God is big enough to handle any situation.



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Jack

 Aren't I lucky to have a super hero for a son?

Jack is seriously one of the sweetest most encouraging little boys you'll ever meet. For example today at Target an older lady says to him,"You sure do have a sweet little brother, buddy!" And Jack replies,"Thank you so very much. I really love Max!" This is a pretty typical attitude from my oldest boy. Usually he's very polite, very talkative, and very encouraging.

When I bake cookies, he will tell me what a great job I have done. When Erik brings home doughnuts for breakfast Jack claps for him. When he sees Lily trying to share her doll with Anna, he's the first one to come up to me and say,"Lily was showing love to Anna! Let's go tell her what a great job she's done!" Or after he's done playing on the slide at the park he's been known to tell the slide thank you. Yes, seriously.

He definitely gets overwhelmed easily, and doesn't always handle new situations very well. But his cheerful and polite disposition makes him absolutely hilarious to be around(if I do say so myself!) Every woman he meets he tells them they are beautiful princesses, and that he is a knight in shining armor who has to protect his little sisters.

I hope he never stops being encouraging(though eventually he'll probably have to stop telling every woman he meets how beautiful they are.;) I hope and pray that as he grows up he'll still want to protect his little sisters. It's not always easy taking care of four little ones all day, but having such a charming four year old makes these days so much fun.

This post is linked to the MOB Society.