In which I question everything I've been Taught...

Well okay maybe not everything. But one thing in particular struck me this morning as I was trying to feed my kids breakfast. Why are some things considered okay to have for breakfast and other things aren't? I grew up in a family where our breakfasts were generally cereal or toast with coffee. Lots and lots of coffee. In fact, as long as you had coffee, you didn't necessarily need anything else to go with it.( I kid, I kid.) My husband grew up in a family where-gasp- no one drank coffee! I know, I still haven't been able to accept it. He did, however, grow up in a family of soda drinkers. So while I never would've been allowed to drink soda first thing in the morning, coffee was always allowed, encouraged in fact.

All this rambling does have a point. See, since Lily's birth we've been the recipients of meals so I haven't had to cook in almost three weeks. Which means there's been very little grocery shopping. So this morning when Jack and Anna came downstairs I realized we didn't have the typical breakfast foods in the house. Usually I feed them waffles or muffins with some fruit, occasionally cereal, doughnuts(Ok maybe more than occasionally! My two year old has been known to come to the breakfast table in the morning and say, "Mommy, how about a doughnut?"), or toaster streudel. Anna saw some cupcakes(Yes we had cupcakes but no breakfast foods. Our priorities are always in the right place!) on the counter and started saying,"Please!" To which I replied, "No, honey, we don't eat cupcakes for breakfast."

But then I had an Epiphany. Why is it all right to eat doughnuts or streudel for breakfast, but not a cupcake? I would even bet that the nutritional value in a cupcake is probably better than a doughnuts. I know I'm just grasping at straws and trying to justify my actions, but really it makes sense when you think about it that way, right? So tell me am I alone in my giving my children junk for breakfast?

I remember reading this after I'd had Anna and looking at my then fourteen month old and feeling like this poem was so right. Now that I have two toddlers and a newborn I'm still left wondering when they stopped being cuddly little newborns! So this poem pretty much describes things around here, especially during nap time for the older two, because I want to enjoy cuddling my baby girl, since here in a few months she probably won't be quite as content to be held all day.


BABIES DON'T KEEP

Mother, oh Mother,

come shake out your cloth,

empty the dustpan,

poison the moth,

hang out the washing

and butter the bread,

sew on a button and make up a bed.

Where is the mother whose house

is so shocking?

She's up in the nursery,

blissfully rocking.

Oh, I've grown shiftless as Little

Boy Blue (lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due

(pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).

The shopping's not done

and there's nothing for stew

and out in the yard there's a hullabaloo

but I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.

Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?

(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).

The cleaning and scrubbing

will wait till tomorrow,

for Children grow up,

as I've learned to my sorrow.

So quiet down, cobwebs.

Dust go to sleep.

I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep......

~Author Unknown ~

Please join us in Welcoming...

Our Lily Faith! Lily entered the world at seven pounds and 14 ounces-our biggest baby so far- and 20 and a half inches. She was born at 5:20 PM after about nine hours of labor.

It all started out on my Friday afternoon doctors appointment. Erik and I had been prepared to have to wait another week to have "the baby", but after doing an ultrasound and doing a quick check, the doctor decided she wanted to deliver the baby either on Monday or Tuesday. Since I have Gestational Diabetes, I am followed closely throughout pregnancy to make sure my babies don't get too big. We opted for Monday, because honestly I was so tired of being pregnant. In fact I'm not even sure I looked at Erik to make sure he was ok with having the baby on Monday!

Saturday and Sunday were spent trying to get things done like laundry and cleaning house. However, we also really wanted to savor every second of the last couple of days as a family of four. As the time came to head to the hospital for the induction, we realized it really didn't matter if the house was spotless before the baby arrived, and we just enjoyed hanging out with Jack and Anna. Dropping the kids off at Erik's parents was really tough on us, since they are so young and neither of them understood that after that they would have a new brother or sister.

Things got better once we got to the hospital because previously we had heard that children were not allowed to visit the newborns and their Mommies, however once we actually made it to registration it turned out to not be a rule that was actually enforced. That night they started some medicine on me, and then the next morning around six my sweet nurse came in and said Erik and I could walk around and that I could take a shower to see if I could get labor started more naturally. Happily I woke up my sleeping husband and informed him we were going for a walk. And walk we did! Unfortunately, it didn't do much, so around 8:30 our nurse began the pitocin. Almost immediately I started feeling contractions, and then a little later when our doctor came in and broke my water I really started feeling things! Whenever they checked me though I still wasn't progressing as fast as I had hoped. Basically I was dilating a centimeter every 2 hours. I knew I was going to be getting an epidural, but I had hoped to wait until the last possible minute in hopes that there would be no chance it would wear off. My nurse and husband kept encouraging me to get the epidural soon, since it was my third child and the odds of it wearing off were extremely unlikely(though that is what happened with Anna!) They also told me it wouldn't slow things down anymore. But I tend to be on the stubborn side at times and decided to wait just a little longer. After the nurse left our room, Erik sat beside me and gave me a hug. He told me he really wanted me to get the epidural, because he hated seeing me in pain. I was still hesitant, but I have to admit I was touched by his sweetness. About two hours later the anesthesiologist came in our room, without even being paged, and asked if I was ready. I was, and within fifteen minutes I was feeling wonderful!

Everyone was so sweet and encouraging throughout the entire labor process, even more so than with Jack and Anna. When the anesthesiologist heard what a difficult labor I had with Anna, he made a point to come in and check on me several times throughout the labor. Our labor and delivery nurse was amazing, she was so excited to see what we were going to have! And of course Erik was phenomenal as my coach. Anything I needed, including pillows being adjusted I got. Finally around five o'clock our nurse came in just to do a blood sugar check, and I started feeling a lot of pressure. At first no one thought it was that big of a deal, but after the first contraction I felt severe pressure with our nurse realized this was it. Thankfully my awesome doctor was across the hall so she ran and got her. In the meantime I was panicking because the pressure was so intense I was sure I was going to deliver Lily before anyone got back to our room. Once everyone got back to our room our nurse and doctor were joking about how the nurse had just told my doctor she was going to get the baby out herself because she was so excited to see what we were going to have. I really wasn't in a joking mood and kept thinking how can they be talking about this when I'm about to deliver?!

After about three pushes the baby's head was out, one push later our little girl was placed on top of my belly. We didn't even hear what we had at first, or maybe I didn't hear what I had, because I was just so relieved labor was over. After a minute or so Erik cut the cord, and I finally asked what we had. To my surprise it was a baby girl! I had pretty much thought we were having another boy, I was so happy to have another precious daughter! After they cleaned Lily up they brought her over to try nursing for the first time. She was a little indignant at being born still, but after a few minutes she latched on, and has been a natural ever since. While all this was going on Erik was calling everyone exclaiming we'd had a little girl, and the nurses were bringing me food and some soda to help me feel better after 24 hours of no eating.

Within an hour and a half my inlaws had brought over Jack and Anna to meet their new sister. Jack was very cautious and worried about mommy being hooked up to all the medical machines. Anna reached for me right away and sat on my bed the whole time contentedly playing with my straw. Both kids have done exceptionally well with having a new baby in the house. In fact I think Erik and I are the ones who are having a difficult time trying to figure out how to balance three kids two and under. We don't want anyone to feel left out!

I am so thankful that my sweet Lily has joined our family. She has a very laid back temperment, basically she only cries when she's hungry or needs her diaper changed. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that not only are we a family of five, but I also have daughters! We feel so blessed to have our little Lily here.

Lately I've been thinking about the impressions that I'm leaving on my children. I know heavy stuff, huh? It's very humbling to realize that I know absolutely nothing about raising children up to know and love Jesus. Every day I feel as though I'm just blindly directing them and guiding them, and praying that somehow they'll see Jesus and His love for them despite my faulty parenting. I've obviously studied the Bible on the subject of parenting and read several awesome books on the topic, and I'm extremely blessed to be surrounded by Christian families who have the same desires to raise their children up that Erik and I do, but seeing as how I've never done this before- and even if I had no two children are ever the same!- I feel indescribably inadequate to parent my children.

Sure I can justify myself saying that we do all the "Christian" things with our kids. We take them to Church, we pray before meals, say bedtime prayers, and read Bible stories. We do little catechisms here or there and are striving to train them in first time obedience, but sometimes I have to check myself. Am I doing these things because I love Jesus with such a fierce passion that my hearts desire is for my children to love Jesus with all their hearts? Or is it just my pride motivating me to strive towards these things? It's a hard question to answer, because if I'm really honest sometimes my pride is what motivates me to train my children. But worse than that would be not confronting these thoughts and letting it take root, and then when Jack and Anna (and the new baby!) grow up and start having questions of their own, or perhaps rebelling against what they've been taught, I would have to stare at the fact that I made an idol out of parenting. That none of it was genuine or pure, but instead I made it something disgusting.

I have been praying fervently, and will for as long as I'm their mom, for wisdom in training these children to love God. Obviously I believe that ultimately it's all up to God as to whether or not these children live their lives for Him or not, and I am aware that I am going to make lots of mistakes, but as Christian parents we clearly have an obligation to teach them diligently. And you know what my mind keeps coming back to? The scripture where Jesus tells the people that the glass is dirty on the inside but clean on the outside. I need to first look at my own personal relationship with God before I'm too quick to harp on my children's sin. It's not been an easy thing to realize, but really while it's good that my kids know how to pray and are familiar with Bible stories, is it going to do that much good when they're ten? If my kids are anything like I was, and most kids, they can sense a phony. I don't ever want my kids to think I'm perfect(or to think that I think I'm perfect!), and never be able to share their struggles, their hearts with me. When I think about the impression I want to leave on my children, I want them to know I love Jesus, but I also want them to realize that I'm not any better than them and I'm on the same journey they're on.

Choosing to Enjoy

It was one of those days. It all started out nice enough. Got up before everyone else, enjoyed some coffee with my Bible study, the kids were still asleep after my study was over so I was able to relax a little longer and check my email (of course I should have picked take a shower, but you know.) Once the kids got up it appeared that they had woke up on the wrong side of the bed, all the peace and warmth I had been feeling earlier that day went by the wayside. I was getting frustrated.

When I was getting them dressed for the day, they were wiggly and irritated that I was changing them on what was a very cold morning. My goal of always speaking in a gentle voice to my kids was quickly diminishing and I was giving into my own irritability, which in turn was making them more grouchy(hmm wonder why?) Anna had been particularly clingy and grumpy that morning, and I was rushing around like a crazy woman trying to pick up the house and get myself cleaned up since I had a doctors appointment to be at by noon. I was not in the mood to deal with an uncooperative child. However, as I was brushing my teeth that morning, I felt a familiar pull. A conviction. Why should my kids be in great, accommodating moods every day? When did having a clean house to come home to at the end of the day become more important to me than seeing to their needs? Why was I so surprised when my 2 year old threw a temper fit over his cereal, and my one year old decided she didn't feel like taking her morning nap? They're toddlers, and God has placed me as their mother to love, guide, and yes discipline and train them. But I also know that God has given me these kids to conform me to be more like Jesus, and I am very aware of my need for Grace every day as I try to figure this mothering thing out.

As I was standing in the bathroom, I felt like God was telling me that I could either choose to act just like they were, or I could stop what I was doing pick up Anna and sit beside Jack while he played. Thankfully, God gave me the grace to stop. I wrapped up my little girl in her pink blanket and sat next to Jack while he served us dinner from his kitchen set. After about twenty minutes of this I remembered there was something that really did need to be done that day before I left for the doctor, I braced myself for the crying to begin again, and reminded myself that there was a right way and a wrong way for me to handle those situations. However, there was no crying. The kids were content to play for a little bit by themselves. I am positive that this won't be the last time I mess up and get my priorities mixed up. But at least I can look back on this day and be encouraged that by the grace of God I can always choose to enjoy my kids.

Baby 3 update

I am right around five weeks from my due date! I know I can't believe it, this pregnancy has gone by so fast. I have already informed my husband that any more children we have, we must try to have them be born in the winter, because between holidays and birthdays I have barely had time to remember I'm pregnant. Ok that might not be completely true, but you get my point.

I am right around 33 weeks pregnant, and at my last ultra sound baby was a little more than 3 pounds. The baby is very active, so active in fact I'm a little nervous about if it's going to be a hyper toddler. Erik and I were laughing today about how when I was pregnant with Jack he was pretty active, and he is most definitely a busy boy, and Anna was never all that active and she's our little sleepy head. So I'm thinking there are some personality traits you can already see from the womb!

We do not know what we are having, we like to be surprised, and we keep going back and forth on what we think the baby is. I am really excited to see how this baby is received by Jack and Anna, though I have little doubt it will be a somewhat difficult transition. I well remember having to get used to having a thirteen month old and a newborn(since you know it was only a little over a year ago!) and I don't imagine things being any easier this time around. But it will pass, and before long we won't even remember life before we became a family of five. That's one of the benefits of having children so close together, they are pretty adaptable!

Christmas at the Saltsgaver's

Our Christmas Tree on Christmas Eve. We hadn't put any gifts out until the kids went to bed, because we wanted them to be surprised in the morning.




Miss Anna enjoying the stuffed dog she got from Erik's aunt and uncle. It's a battery charged dog that barks, giggles, and rolls over, and Anna is absolutely in love with it. She most certainly gets her love of animals from her daddy!



The kids enjoying their new fish tank. We put a towel over it, and let the kids pull it off on Christmas Morning.



The mini drum set was the gift that trumped all others for Jack. He adores those drums, much to Erik's delight! When he's coloring, which used to be his all time favorite activity, he'll say, "Can I please get down so I can play the drums?"



The face of one very happy and worn out little boy on Christmas. We had such a great day celebrating and relaxing with each other!